Respect Yo'Self

Updated: Aug 28, 2018

When you stop listening to your logic brain, the one that's been predisposed to a lifetime of conditioning you to colour inside the lines, and you start listening to the deeper parts of yourself, you start finding the answers to some of your biggest questions.

As women, one of the most important things we can learn is to listen to our yoni. Yoni knows what you need, she is you. She is the origin of life itself. And yet, we are still scared to touch her, to really get to know our yoni. And that in turn stops us from truly getting to know ourselves.

It’s as though we as women fear it. Yet our yoni, our vagina dare I say the word out loud, is the center of all creation – literally and figuratively. She is the goddess within.

And I want to tell you right now that it is OK to connect with her!

We are taught as early as toddlers not to touch “down there”. A young girl discovers what lies between her legs, she associates no sexual connotation, she’s just curious, as she is with every other body part, yet we tell her ‘no, don’t touch’.

Girls grow and go through puberty, they bleed, and we tell them to go about business as usual. We don’t encourage any menstrual traditions or ceremony, we don’t teach our children that it’s an important rite of passage or that it’s the essence of being a woman. We don’t tell them it means we can create life. Instead we tell them to hide in a toilet cubicle and plug it up. Stop the bleeding, hide the evidence, and don’t speak about it, its gross.

We hit womanhood, we start feeling the tingles down below, but no one talks about what they are and what they mean. I remember masturbating at about 13 years old and I called my clitoral orgasm the “guilt feeling”. I didn’t know what it was, I didn’t understand the feeling and so it made me feel guilty. This happened for years until I finally learnt what I was experiencing. But by then it just felt wrong to touch myself at all. Only boys could touch me down there…

Imagine if we started teaching our children to be curious, to touch, to explore, to learn, to enjoy, to respect themselves and their body. A girl who grows into a women trusting herself and respecting herself, knowing herself, is going to take more care with herself and her yoni. She will have learnt to understand and appreciate her body and her sexuality too. She will feel connected to her inner self and her physical body, she will know her worth! How fucking important is that!

If you can connect with your Kundalini energy, the feminine energy that rests dormant at the base of the spine and flows through you in orgasm, awakening the seven chakras and expanding your state of consciousness, then you can heal yourself.

So ladies, learn to call upon yourself when you need answers because deep down, you already know what you need.

And while you're at it, start encouraging the girls and women around you to do the same!

A few months ago as I started digging deeper into my own sexuality and spirituality I did a lot of research as to how I could heal, and deepen my connection with my yoni. That’s when I came across yoni eggs and crystal pleasure wands. Read more about them here.


CHALLENGE FOR THE LADIES! Awaken your kundalini energy:

Charge your crystals (your egg and wand) in the sea and the sun, or under the moon, anywhere that invigorates you, and create some intentions. What do you want to achieve, how do you want to connect to yourself better? Then, prepare a sacred space for yourself, get some beautiful pillows, blankets, candles, incense and music, whatever makes your heart sing and helps you feel relaxed. After that, you’re ready to let yourself go.

It can feel weird at first, using this beautiful crystal wand to pleasure yourself, especially if you haven’t done that kind of thing before. But stick with it, lay back, breathe, close your eyes and feel. Because something truly amazing happens next…

For me, I connected with my yoni, with the energy in my wand and felt the love spread like light throughout my entire being. I gave in to it, I felt it all and it opened me up like never before. I learnt so much about myself and my yoni, my heart and my deepest feelings in that moment. It was so moving and left me feeling on top of the world for the rest of the day.

So don’t be scared, don’t be shy, there is nothing to be ashamed of. If you can’t make love to yourself, how could anyone else?

Extra tip: get your partner to charge your wand with his/her/their intentions then use it on you. Let them spread their light and love through you as they pleasure you with the wand. It’s beautiful!

Let me if you have any questions about the practice, and know how you go with it  :) If you would like to receive a video 'how to' and demonstration on how you can connect with your yoni, get in touch.