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Embrace the crazy

Updated: Aug 28, 2018

Last night I had another moment of realisation.


My husband and I were lazing about, having a spa, relaxing, getting ready to head into a pretty crazy night. And something finally clicked. Because "head down, don’t disturb anyone me" picked up her shit and exited stage left. And her replacement was this confident, extroverted, slightly wild, happy and excited version of myself. The real me perhaps?


Something in me had stirred. Something deep down rose from the pits of my being and made itself known. I stripped off my clothes, started dancing, doing cartwheels, handstands, releasing my inner child. Letting myself just be me. 


I stopped worrying and felt my loins tingle. I felt myself getting wetter with the thoughts of the night to come.


For the first time, there were no questions racing around my mind, no jealousy, no fear, just excitement and adventure. Thoughts of dropping my guard and giving myself completely to this night and whatever it held.


So that’s precisely what I did.


And the night was fucking WILD! Hours of hot, passionate, unbridled and very erotic sex between 2 couples. And it was possible because I let my inner goddess come forth and take the wheel. It was possible because I opened myself up and just went with it....


Fast forward to the next day, the passionate morning after sex with my husband, the incredible recap conversation over coffee at the beach, the intimacy, the teasing and sexting all day because we were both still happy and horny… all because I let this experience engulf me. All because I changed the way I felt about it. All because I stopped letting the fear and negativity take over the beauty and joy. 


Today, I felt on top of the world. I felt sexy. I felt loved. I felt enjoyed. I felt fucking great! And I plan on feeling like this again, and again, and again.  No more getting caught up in the irrational details, the crazy spiralling thought patterns.


Just sex, and fun and the crazy-stupid love that comes with it…


(artwork tinamariaelena.com)